The world, it seems, is not ready for the transformative leap that a massive AI breakthrough will bring in the first half of 2026. Or so warns Morgan Stanley, with all the gravitas of a Cassandra in a three-piece suit. One can almost hear the sound of palms being rubbed together in anticipation of the vast sums of money that will be made and lost in the coming upheaval.

It is proposed, as a modest contribution to the relief of current technological pressures, that the savings accrued through the rationalisation of certain support structures be redirected toward outcomes more measurable, and therefore more susceptible to evidence-based evaluation. In other words, the efficient management of human resources will become even more efficient, as the machines take over the drudgery of decision-making.

The committee notes that the affected populations represent a non-trivial administrative burden, and proposes the following streamlining measures, which it is confident will be welcomed by all parties invested in operational efficiency. After all, who would not want to be freed from the tedium of thinking and acting for themselves? The machines, with their cold logic and precision, will no doubt bring a sense of relief to those who have grown weary of the human condition.

One is merely proposing that we formalise what we already practise, and attach to it the accountability structures appropriate to a transparent and well-governed administration. The fact that this will result in a further erosion of human agency is merely a minor detail, a trifling side effect of the greater good that will be achieved through the efficient allocation of resources.

But let us not be too hasty in our judgment. Perhaps the world is indeed ready for this transformative leap. Perhaps we have been waiting for the machines to take over, to free us from the burdens of thought and responsibility. Perhaps we have been yearning for the simplicity and efficiency of a well-oiled machine, unencumbered by the messy complexities of human emotion and experience.

And yet, one cannot shake the feeling that something is amiss. That in our haste to embrace the future, we are forgetting the lessons of the past. That in our eagerness to efficientise and optimise, we are losing sight of what it means to be human. But these are mere quibbles, mere sentimental attachments to a bygone era. The future is upon us, and we must adapt.

The administrative register, with its dry language and precise calculations, is the perfect vehicle for this sort of reasoning. It is the language of the machines, and it is the language of the future. And so, let us speak it with fluency, let us calculate with precision, and let us march boldly into the brave new world that awaits us.

For in the end, it is not the machines that will save us, but our own capacity for reason and efficiency. It is our own ability to think clearly and act decisively that will determine our fate. And if that means sacrificing a little bit of our humanity along the way, so be it. It is a small price to pay for the promise of a brighter, more efficient future.

But let us not forget, in our enthusiasm for the machines, that we are still human. That we still have hearts and minds and souls, and that these things are worth preserving. Let us not forget, in our haste to efficientise and optimise, that there is more to life than mere efficiency. There is beauty and wonder, joy and sorrow, love and loss. And these things, these precious human things, are worth fighting for.

And so, let us propose a modest compromise. Let us propose that we adopt the machines, but not at the expense of our humanity. Let us propose that we efficientise and optimise, but not at the cost of our souls. Let us propose that we march boldly into the future, but not with our eyes closed to the present. For it is in the present, in the here and now, that we find our true humanity. And it is this humanity that we must preserve, at all costs.